I have a client who is making great progress on taking more control of his  behavior, truly understanding the impact his actions have on colleagues and in leading his organization through focused energy, wit, skill and passion. When I asked his manager if there was anything that his direct report (my client) could do to enhance his effectiveness and leadership, the manager stated yes. The manager added that he would not mention this to my client until his “problem” raised its head again. “Why” I inquired?  ”Because I only want to give him positive feedback and reenforcement.” he replied. Interestingly the manager knows that this client is very sensitive about NOT making missteps (having had a history of them) and he also knew that the client can very quickly and easily feel guilty about his behavior  Had the client repeated his problem, no doubt the client would feel embarrassed and guilty. So why was the manager reluctant  to address this situation?

Because of HIS discomfort.  Never underestimate the ability of your own vulnerabilities and discomforts to stand in the way of managing and leading as effectively as possible.